


Soulmate on Duty

by amoralie



Category: SHINee
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Explicit Language, Fraternity Parties, Homophobic Language, M/M, Minor Kim Jonghyun/Lee Taeyeon, Minor Kim Jongin | Kai/Lee Taemin, Outing, Reslife, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-07-12 15:53:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15998483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amoralie/pseuds/amoralie
Summary: Kibum’s in his last year at university. As a senior and a resident assistant, he’s seen it all. Except his soulmate. Things have been disappointingly quiet on that front. That unexpectedly changes when the president of the rowdiest fraternity on campus knocks on his door. Maybe opposites do attract. Or maybe there’s more than meets the eye to this frat boy.





	1. It's my birthday, I can cry if I want to

**Author's Note:**

> Cliché soulmate/college RA AU. The warning is for an incident that happened in the past and wasn't between the main pairing. I'll add a note to the chapter(s) the warning applies to.

The first few weeks of any new semester were always hectic. New classes, new faces, and another round of tuition bills were enough to make anyone’s head spin. But for Kibum, a resident assistant in one of the freshmen-only dorms on campus, the beginning of fall semester tended to be a little more chaotic than the average student’s. 

This year, Kibum’s fifty freshmen seemed more rambunctious than usual. Even as a seasoned RA, he had some trouble getting his group to quiet down during his floor meeting. First, there was the trio that wouldn’t stop giggling about his name. Then it was the two dance majors who wouldn’t stop snapchatting despite sitting literally on top of one another. However, the icing on the cake was when Kibum plugged in his laptop and instead of presenting the do’s-and-don’ts of living in the dorms with reslife-relevant memes, he accidentally revealed a cute but slightly nsfffm (not safe for first floor meeting) picture of him and his boyfriend dressed as Peter Pan and Tinkerbell. Kibum was Tinkerbell. The giggles turned into laughs at that point and Kibum was pretty sure one of the dance majors snuck in a snap. Kibum blamed the chaos on ignorance and nerves. Not to mention the new rule that allowed soulmates to room together.

As someone who stopped trying to find their soulmate years ago, Kibum hadn’t given much thought to the new rule until he received his floor roster and saw four rooms marked as soulmate-occupied. Most of the pairs he could deal with, however, Kibum was already expecting trouble from one pair in particular. Taemin and Jongin. The snap-happy pair of dancers who happened to be his neighbors. They hadn’t even been there for 24 hours and already Taemin asked where the lost-and-found was and Jongin was caught trying to sneak one of his dogs into the building. Admittedly, they weren’t that bad. It was nice having openly gay residents. And if he was being honest, Kibum’s heart melted a little when he spied the duo trying to push their beds together. His heart re-froze when the headboards of said beds started knocking rhythmically against his wall well past quiet hours.

It wasn’t that Kibum was bitter about not having a soulmate. Okay, so maybe he was a little bitter. But he was in a perfectly happy and fulfilling relationship with someone who wasn’t his soulmate. More than anything, he wished other people wouldn’t put so much emphasis on the whole thing. Having a soulmate didn’t guarantee a loving relationship. His parents were a prime example of this. Yes, the two were soulmates, but besides being disappointed in Kibum’s sexuality and life aspirations, nothing held them together. Kibum even doubted that they talked anymore. Their relationship had evolved into convenience. And Kibum was supposed to want that? 

Unfortunately, most people didn’t see things the way he did. And when they looked at him, they saw a man who was incomplete. And deep down, Kibum really did wish to find his soulmate. He wished his boyfriend could have been the one. But Hyeongseop’s first words to him didn’t match the grey-ish text scrolling up Kibum’s left thigh. They weren’t soulmates, but Kibum hoped the work they put into their relationship would still be enough.

In any case, soulmate roommates were the least of his worries this year. As a senior in the fashion design program, his final year was devoted to polishing his portfolio and hopefully nabbing an internship that would benefit him in his professional career. This fall he would be busy preparing for the winter showcase that would determine who he would be interning with come spring. A lot was riding on his performance this semester, and there wasn’t room for distraction. 

But distraction was always guaranteed when he was on duty as a RA. Even more so when it was a weekend shift. As one of the senior members on his building’s staff, Kibum was given the Friday night when fraternities and sororities officially handed out bids. Following the official bids were the unofficial celebrations where alcohol tended to – unofficially – flow freely. Although disappointed with his luck, Kibum was glad he’d get duty over with before his boyfriend came to spend the rest of the weekend for his birthday. Nothing killed the mood like the duty phone ringtone.

Months ago, Hyeongseop had promised to fly in from New York for Kibum’s birthday. Seop was technically Kibum’s age, but he had dropped out to aggressively pursue modeling. They met in an apparel design class just a few months before Seop moved away. Immediately they clicked and started dating soon after. And although they weren’t soulmates, their relationship had been through enough to the point where Kibum was confident that they could build their lives together. They had even come up with a system to work around their differing schedules and the long-distance nature of their relationship. At this point, Kibum was very happy with how things were going. But nothing beat having Seop actually with him. Needless to say, Kibum was beyond excited to see his boyfriend. He just had to get through duty first.

The first part of Kibum’s shift was blessedly tame. Nothing was out of the ordinary as people got ready to go out. The only upset was that instead of being paired with Nicole, his long-time friend and duty partner, he was paired with first-time RA Yeri. As only a sophomore, Yeri was fresh from living in the dorms as a resident herself and was eager to “see some action,” as she put it. If Kibum was a superstitious man, he would later blame her for jinxing the night.

At approximately 1:05am, all hell broke loose in the dorm. Just after starting their last round, Kibum and Yeri stumbled upon a fluorescent trail of vomit leading to an extremely intoxicated resident and her slightly less intoxicated friend. After sending one resident away in an ambulance and cleaning up the vomit with paper towels and a nearby pizza box, the pair got the news about an explicit mural painted with dining hall condiments. Before even reaching the mess, Yeri literally bumped into the first wave of newly-minted fraternity and sorority candidates. Tragically for everyone involved, the group was openly carrying alcohol. After writing everyone up and wiping off the sriracha dick graffiti, Kibum was relieved to be back in his room. And just in time to pick up a call from Seop.

“Hey! It’s so good to hear from you. You wouldn’t believe the night I’m having. Happy birthday to me, right?” Kibum whined, struggling to strip off his RA jacket and joggers. After getting the offending clothes off, he settled into bed to talk to Seop.

“Ah, really? I’m sorry. I should let you rest-”

“No no no! I’m fine. I want to talk to you. I'm up anyway.” 

And even though Kibum did want to talk to Seop, he couldn’t help but notice the time. At nearly three in the morning, Kibum was concerned. Because of the time difference, Kibum usually spoke to Seop right after dinnertime when the other man was getting ready for bed. This was probably the latest the other had ever called him in their two year relationship.

“Is everything alright? Your flight’s in a few hours, shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

It took a while for Seop to respond, but when he did it was with a heavy sigh, “I’m not flying out.”

Kibum’s tired mind raced through a checklist of what could possibly be holding him back. The weather was fine, Seop seemed healthy earlier in the day, there weren’t any family or friend emergencies, and fashion week hadn’t started. There was seemingly nothing that could prevent him from flying. 

“What do you mean?”

“I’m not flying. I’m not coming.”

“But what about my birthday? You’re going to miss my party. What’s going on, Seop?”

“I can’t- We can’t do this anymore.” Seop finally said.

“What?”

“I’m so sorry, Kibum. I can’t be with you anymore. I want to break up.” 

Still shocked, Kibum managed to stutter out, “I don’t- what- I don’t understand. What changed? Did I do something wrong? I thought we were fine. We were fine a few hours ago!”

“Nothing’s changed and you didn’t do anything wrong. Just, New York fashion week is starting, and then it’s London and Milan and Paris. And I think I have a chance of finally finding them. I feel it. I’m sorry, Kibum, but you have to understand.”

And then it dawned on Kibum. Despite being cocooned in his bed, it felt like someone had dropped ice cold water down his spine. And then he was angry.

“Understand what?” He asked with a bit more venom than he intended. “That you’re dumping me on the off-chance that you find your soulmate?”

“Yes. Listen, I’m sorry. I tried. But I’m not like you. I actually want to find the person that I’m meant to be with. That’s meant for me.”

“I want that too. I thought we could have that. I thought we did have that! We've been together for years! Why the fuck did you wait so long to do this?” Kibum asked, voice steadily rising.

“I’m sorry, okay?” Seop begged. “I was afraid. I didn’t want to lose you-”

“Lose me? It doesn’t sound like you were ever planning to be with me anyway!”

“I know, but-”

“All this time was I just a warm hole? A little piece of ass you keep when New York gets too-”

“It was never just about sex! I loved you!”

“You loved me?” Kibum growled, “Then explain to me how you can call me at three in the morning on my fucking birthday and break up with me. And what if I hadn’t picked up? Would you have just dumped me over voicemail? A text maybe? One final shitty dick pic with the words 'Kibum, we're through?'” 

Against his will, a sob escaped his chest, but he kept going, “How long was I a placeholder until something better came along?” 

The silence on the other end was indefinite, and because of it, Kibum could hear his heart breaking.

“I hate you. We’re done.” Without bothering to wait for Seop’s reply, Kibum hung up and threw himself into his pillows.

Kibum was angry. No, he was furious. He couldn’t believe Seop would do this. Two years of phone dates, saving up for cross-country visits, “good morning” texts, “good night” sexts, and it was all for nothing. Even worse, Seop had done all of that, stringing him along, just to end things on his birthday!

Kibum had dated losers in the past. Young and insecure, he had trusted men that he now knew to stay far away from. But never had he gotten that impression from Seop. Seop had been sweet, and patient, and thoughtful. He was the calm to Kibum’s manic. A soothing, rational voice when things were a little too much to handle. In exchange, Kibum pushed Seop out of his comfort zone and encouraged his dreams. Kibum had loved him so deeply and it stung that Seop hadn’t felt the same. It hurt that he wasn’t enough. And with that realization, the tears started rolling.

However, before he could really get into his feelings, he was interrupted with three tentative knocks on his door. 

Already enraged and feeling vulnerable, he shouted, “I just got dumped so this better be an emergency!”

Unfortunately, the knocks continued. Faster this time.

“Fuck me.”

Without bothering to redress or check the peep hole, Kibum wrenched open his door. He was met with three pairs of eyes: two belonging to the shit-head dancers, one belonging to a man he had never seen before. All three looked increasingly uncomfortable as Kibum remained standing in his underwear wiping tears from his eyes.

“Who the hell are you?” He asked the tall, unknown man holding up a very inebriated Taemin and Jongin. 

Despite being drunk off their asses, Kibum’s residents had the decency to look ashamed. However, Kibum wasn’t thinking of those two right then. He wasn’t even thinking about how he was practically naked in front of three virtual strangers. Or how handsome the unknown man was. Instead, he was trying to figure out the funny feeling in his gut. It started right behind his exposed navel and seemed to blossom outward. It felt like riding a roller coaster, or winning a prize, or falling in love. It felt like being full, or satisfied, or complete. By some unknown force, Kibum’s eyes were drown to the man’s forearm where light grey text became vibrantly magenta, spelling out the words he had uttered seconds ago.

“I think I’m your soulmate.”


	2. Tomorrow will worry about itself

_“Who the hell are you?” ...“I think I’m your soulmate.”_

***

“So I’m just standing there and I feel this ... thing go down my thigh. Now I have _this_!” Kibum whisper-shouted while hiking up the hem of his shorts. Revealed was forest green text spelling out the man from last night’s words: _I think I’m your soulmate_.

“Wow.” Jonghyun numbly said.

“I know!”

“Wait, so what happened with Taemin and Jongin?”

“Oh God, it was a mess,” Kibum whined into his latte. “One of them lost his keys and the other locked his in the room before they went out, so I had to get Yeri to come open their door while I put clothes on-”

“You were naked?”

“I had underwear on! Jesus, it was like three in the morning, give me a break! Anyway, Yeri took the fucking hint and stayed with me while we got Taemin and Jongin to drink some water and get into bed. She walked the guy out afterwards. Apparently, his name is Minho and he’s the president of the frat Taemin and Jongin were rushing.”

“Oh my God, Bummie! Choi Minho is your soulmate?” Jonghyun’s eyes widened to the point of being alarming.

“Uhh, I guess? I mean, I don’t really know his family name.”

“Kibum, babe, listen to me, Minho is-”

“A sex god. And the president of Sigma Mu Epsilon.” Nicole interrupted, handing Kibum a pumpkin muffin. “For you, hun. I’m so sorry about last night. Seop’s a bastard who didn’t deserve you anyway.”

Kibum gladly took the muffin and averted his eyes to his drink. After getting his residents into bed and avoiding Minho, Kibum had texted both Jonghyun and Nicole about what had happened. That included breaking up with Seop and meeting Minho. Despite how exciting meeting his soulmate should be, Kibum still felt raw about being dumped. Especially on his birthday. Especially by the man he thought was the love of his life.

“I just,” Kibum sighed before starting again, “It’s just really bad timing. I don’t think I’m ready to deal with this.”

“No one’s forcing you to deal with anything. But this isn’t as bad of timing as you think it is. Seop’s gone. You can be with your soulmate now if you want to!”

“I’d just feel like I’m using him as a rebound, you know?”

“Then don’t use him as one.” Jonghyun said simply. “Take your time. Be honest. Be open. Actually talk to him and get to know him. And let him get to know you too.”

“Jonghyun’s right,” Nicole admitted before a devious smirk took over her face. “And what better chance to break the ice than your birthday party?”

“I don’t know. I don’t think a gay bar is somewhere a frat boy would be comfortable with for a first date.”

“Who said anything about a date? And anyway, if he does want to be with you, a gay bar is exactly the type of thing he needs to be comfortable with.”

“I think what Nicole is trying to say is that when you were with Seop, you didn’t always get to do the things you liked. He was so deep in the closet that you two could never really go out together. He had so many rules and places that he couldn’t be seen. If something does go somewhere with Minho, this is your chance to show him that you like going out and being ...” Jonghyun trailed off while searching for the right word.

“An attention whore?” Nicole supplied.

“I was going to say social, but that works too.”

Kibum glared at both of them over his coffee, but there was no real heat to it. If anything, he was grateful that they were trying to lift his mood.

The events of last night were a lot to process. After ending things with Seop, Kibum felt lost. Seop had been such a big part of his life for so long. Not waking up to a text from him felt wrong. And contemplating the end of their relationship left an empty hole in Kibum’s vision of his future. It was unsettling how much he had planned his life around Seop.

“So what’s the plan, Bummie?” Jonghyun asked, interrupting Kibum’s thoughts. “Is the party still on? And what about Minho?”

“I want to go out. I want to see everybody, and I really want a drink. So the party’s definitely still on. But I’m not sure about Minho coming tonight. It’s a little too soon after Seop.”

“That makes sense. I understand wanting to take your time. You know what’s best for you and I’ll support whatever decision you make.”

“Jonghyun’s empathetic bullshit is great and everything, but we all know how you are. You’re just going to mope around and waste time on Instagram. You need to make a move and your party is the perfect opportunity. You’re going to look great, you’re going to be surrounded by people who love you, and if you don’t want to talk to Minho, you can just flounce away and awkwardly flirt with the bartender!”

Their table was silent as Kibum and Jonghyun digested Nicole’s words. While Nicole looked pleased with herself, Jonghyun looked like he was constipated. Kibum couldn’t think of a response either, but he felt slightly insulted.

“I wish I had more time to tear down her argument, but I have to get back to work. Don’t let Nicole bully you into doing anything you’re not ready for, okay? I’ll see you two at Crescent.” Kibum nodded and silently waved goodbye.

Jonghyun was Kibum’s first and closest friend. He was also his first love. It seemed almost fitting then that Jonghyun was his first heartbreak too. They weren’t soulmates. They were never meant to be. And their relationship drastically changed when Jonghyun met his soulmate Taeyeon. Gone were the casual affectionate gestures and long phone calls. Gone too were the secret kisses and nights spent together. Instead, Jonghyun was able to move forward and openly with Taeyeon while Kibum sealed away his feelings and retreated further into the closet.

They were all so young when everything happened, so Kibum didn’t fault Jonghyun for the abrupt rejection. And as much as he thought she was a brat, he didn’t blame Taeyeon either. Kibum saw how much they loved each other and gradually he moved on. As time passed, he was also able to start the daunting process of coming out. But as Kibum watched Jonghyun work, he couldn’t help but silently mourn what could have been. Selfishly, he wondered how his life would be different if Taeyeon never existed.

“Again, I’m sorry about Seop.” Nicole said, bringing Kibum back to the present. “That was a shitty thing for him to do. I know you loved him. But there’s still time to change your mind about Minho coming tonight. It’s not like you’re committing to a new relationship. You don’t even have to speak with him!”

“Thanks, but it’s just too soon. I don’t want to invite him tonight.”

Visibly disappointed, Nicole sighed, “Alright, fine. Should we head back? I’ll do your makeup if you help me with my hair.”

Kibum agreed and the two returned to campus to get ready. Nicole filled the silence with gossip about the other RAs. Most of it didn’t interest Kibum, but apparently Kyungsoo, the quiet computer science major on the first floor, had met his soulmate a week after training. Nicole hadn’t met the man yet, but she heard from another staff member that he was at least six feet tall, had huge ears and played guitar. She also heard that Kyungsoo was spending nearly every night out of the building and sneaking back in before breakfast. Staff was split between thinking it was scandalous and cute.

Kibum tried to be happy for Kyungsoo. The man was calm and level-headed. A great RA and an even better listener. After Nicole, Kyungsoo was Kibum’s second favorite person to be on duty with. But no matter how much he wanted to be happy, Kibum couldn’t help but feel jealous that another one of his friends was matched up. Nicole, Jonghyun, Woohyun, Amber, Eunji, and now Kyunsoo were all in relationships. Even Yeri, who was growing on Kibum since handling Minho last night, was committed to her soulmate. Why did things have to be so complicated for him?

More importantly, why did Nicole have to be right when she said Minho was a sex god? Kibum couldn’t deny that his soulmate was gorgeous. Instead of sleeping last night, he spent hours poring over Minho’s social media. What he found were a collection of magazine-worthy shots of the man. There were stunning pictures of Minho playing soccer with his shirt off, bronze skin shining with sweat. A good handful of him dressed to the nines with a hundred watt smile surrounded by his frat brothers. And worst of all, dozens of him with his arms around pretty, blond sorority girls. Before even having a conversation with the man, it felt as though Minho was already out of Kibum’s league.

Seeing Minho’s life felt like getting dumped a second time. Kibum wasn’t too fond of his college’s greek life. Certain ... events that transpired in the past made him anxious at even the thought of being with someone in a frat. Especially someone in Sigma Mu Epsilon. Knowing his fraternity was such a big part of Minho’s life was disheartening.

Trying to distract himself from obsessing over the state of his love life, Kibum threw himself into getting ready for his party. And when Nicole finally came down after her shower, he threw himself into getting her ready too. Tonight more than any other night, Kibum wanted to look good. Each layer of clothing and makeup felt like armor. He may have just been dumped, and he may have just found his soulmate in the least romantic way possible, but he was going to enjoy tonight.

“We look hot.” Kibum said, inspecting his face in the mirror.

“Damn right we do!” Nicole responded. “Are you sure you don’t want me to invite Minho? There’s still time and you really do look stunning.”

Nicole looked hopeful, but Kibum was firm in his earlier decision, “Yeah, I’m sure. Come on, let’s leave.”

And with that, Kibum and Nicole were on their way to Crescent. Crescent was Kibum’s favorite place to spend the night out. Not only were the drinks strong and the music loud, but the bar first and foremost was a gay bar. And Kibum would be lying if he said he didn’t like the company and attention of other gay men. Even when he was with Seop, it was nice to go out dancing and get noticed.

Kibum would be lying again if he said he wasn’t excited for the extra attention tonight. Because regardless of what happened last night, Kibum was going to enjoy his birthday. He was going to drink, he was going to dance, he was going to flirt, and he was going to do all of that while looking gorgeous. And if whatever he partook in resulted in a hangover, then he’d just worry about that tomorrow. And really, what did he have to worry about anyway?

When he finally reached the corner his friends had claimed, he was greeted with cheers, hugs, and offers to buy him drinks. Never one to say no to free alcohol, Kibum let his friends pull him up to the bar. After downing a few shots that left him well past tipsy, Kibum waved goodbye and ambled onto the dance floor.

He was enveloped in a hug as soon as he reached the crowded space, “Hey, happy birthday!”

From the cologne alone, Kibum knew who was behind him. Woohyun had been Kibum’s second love and his second heartbreak. Just like Jonghyun, Woohyun hadn’t been Kibum’s soulmate. In some ways, the disappointment was easier to handle. Kibum was older and he understood that most soulmates weren’t like his parents. People wanted to be with their soulmates and generally experienced loving, fulfilling relationships. But in other ways, breaking up with Woohyun had been devastating.

In the wake of their separation, Kibum had been a mess. Feeling like he wasn’t good enough, he had misguidedly set out for any way to find validation. He never did find it. Rather, he was taken advantage of and cruelly outed.

Woohyun was a good friend. But being with him reminded Kibum too much of the most difficult period in his life. Therefore, their friendship had been reduced to meetings like these – surrounded by other people and largely superficial.

“Thank you! What did you get me?” Kibum giggled at the look of horror on Woohyun’s face.

“I didn’t- I mean- I thought-”

Kibum’s laugh put an end to his friend’s suffering, “You know I’m only joking. Although it is in bad taste to show up to my birthday party without a gift. Asshole.”

“What would you say if I told you that my presence was the gift?”

“I would tell you that that line is tired and that I expect better from you. Besides, we all know my presence is the true gift.”

“You got me there, birthday boy,” Woohyun laughed. “Anyway, what's new with you?”

The alcohol had removed Kibum’s filter, and before he could stop himself, he blurted out, “Seop left me and I met my soulmate.”

 _Fuck_.

The smile slid off Woohyun’s face and an alarmed expression took its place. Kibum’s mind raced desperately to figure out a way to return to the lighthearted, shallow banter, but he wasn’t quick enough.

“Damn. I’m so sorry. When did this all happen?”

“This morning.”

“What the hell, Kibum! Are you okay?” Woohyun had stopped dancing and was searching Kibum’s face for some kind of indication of, well, Kibum didn’t actually know. Distress, maybe? Proof that he had finally lost it?

“I’ve been through worse.”

Woohyun agreed awkwardly before asking, “So who is it? Your soulmate?”

“Choi Minho.”

“Wait, Choi Minho? As in the president of Sig Mu Ep?”

“Yup.”

“Isn’t that the same frat that-”

“Wow, this has been great but I think I’m going to celebrate my birthday with other people now,” Kibum said loudly, drowning out the end of Woohyun’s question.

At the hurt look on his friend’s face, Kibum paused and added, “I really glad you came. My feelings are a little bruised, but this isn’t my first break up. And I’ll figure out the soulmate stuff eventually. I appreciate your concern, but let’s not talk about this tonight.”

Woohyun agreed again and Kibum was relieved. His brain finally figured out a way to lighten the mood and he grinned, “I’ve decided to forgive you for not getting me a gift on one condition: buy my next drink.”

The rest of Kibum’s night was spent in a pleasurably numb, drunken haze. True to his earlier vows, Kibum drank, danced, and flirted shamelessly. To Nicole’s horror and disappointment, he even managed to get the bartender’s number. She scolded him and tried reminding him about someone else whose number he should have gotten. Someone who was apparently way more important than a random guy in a bar. And someone who she was going to invite right that minute.

But Kibum didn’t care about her vaguely threatening reminders. She could invite whoever she wanted. The more the merrier anyway. Plus, he was busy coordinating the after-party with Jonghyun and Taeyeon. Unsurprisingly, the group had gotten a little too loud and a little too messy to continue in a public place. Jonghyun and Taeyeon had previously offered their apartment as a way to continue the night and now appeared to be the perfect time to cash in on that promise. 

Kibum continued to ignore Nicole’s threats when they reached the apartment. He especially didn’t pay her any mind when the most beautiful stranger walked in and approached him. The man was tall and handsome and had the funniest magenta words running up his arm. He had lovely eyes and nice lips and a body to die for. Even better, Kibum's interest was reciprocated. His last thought before kissing the man was that Nicole was watching them and she looked smug. But as Kibum’s lips touched the stranger’s, the warning signs that had started flashing were silenced. He’d worry about it tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hbd kibum


	3. Mistakes Have Been Made

Kibum woke up with a dry mouth and a pounding headache. He hadn’t been this hungover in months. At least it didn’t seem like he made any bad decisions. And from the way the sunlight filtered through blinds rather than curtains, it appeared that he had stayed the night in Jonghyun and Taeyeon’s spare room. Probably for the best. He didn’t want to ruin his RA credibility just yet. It was hard to write people up for alcohol if they saw you wasted the weekend before. Kibum learned that lesson the hard way.

Just as he was tentatively getting out of the bed, an arm reached over and pulled him back. A very warm, very strong, very tan arm. An arm with familiar magenta text. An arm that was now resting over Kibum’s own very naked waist. And that’s when he realized he didn’t just make a bad decision last night, he made the worst decision. Confirming his fears, he peeked around and saw Minho.

Repressing the urge to scream, Kibum groaned, “I think I’m going to be sick.”

Minho got up instantly, retracting the arm that he had draped over Kibum’s middle. Concern was evident on his face and if Kibum wasn’t still so mortified, he’d probably bask in the attention.

“Oh shit! Do you need help getting to the bathroom? Fuck, is there anything I can do? Should I get-”

“No!” Kibum interrupted, now clutching the blankets up to hide his exposed chest, “I just need you to leave. Like, right now.”

“Um, are you sure? I mean, I already saw everything last night and I’d feel much better if I helped you-”

“I’m sure! Leave!”

With eyes impossibly wide and maybe even a little hurt, Minho shimmied out from underneath the covers and began picking up his clothes. Kibum sneaked a peak while the other man was pulling his sweater over his head and immediately wished he hadn’t. Not only was Minho drop dead gorgeous, but his neck and shoulders were littered with marks that looked suspiciously like the ones Kibum used to leave on Seop when they, well, fucked. And if he was being honest, Kibum remembered leaving every last one of those marks.

Trying not to lose the little bit of sanity he had left, Kibum averted his gaze and focused on settling his rolling stomach and panicked breathing. He would _not_ lose it in front of Minho. Not again at least.

“I’ll just give my number to Jonghyun and you can text me later.”

“Sounds great! Thanks for everything!”

What.

The.

_Fuck?_

Who said shit like that? Kibum wanted to disappear. Maybe melt into the bed. Or change his name and live on a deserted island in the middle of the sea.

“Uh, yeah, sure, feel better soon. And please text me.” With a final worried look, Minho walked his tight behind (Kibum would know) out of the bedroom and out of Jonghyun and Taeyeon’s apartment.

A million thoughts rushed through Kibum’s mind as he attempted to become one with the sheets. Maybe they hadn't done anything. Maybe Kibum's fuzzy, pornographic memories were just alcohol-induced fever dreams. Maybe Kibum just spilled his drink on himself and Minho decided to get naked too. You know. Solidarity. Or maybe Jonghyun and Taeyon's radiator overheated in the middle of the party and he and Minho got too hot and took off all their clothes. It really wasn't too far-fetched. Didn't it happen in a Nelly song?

But then Kibum looked over the marks on his own body. There were distinct bruises on his hips and a familiar soreness in his backside. Not to mention the condom wrappers lying torn open on the nightstand. They fucked. There was no denying it.

When he felt able to get up without falling over, Kibum got dressed as quietly as he could. If he was lucky, he could maybe avoid confronting Jonghyun and Taeyeon. Both were lovely people, but Kibum couldn’t handle facing them after what he and Minho did in their apartment. Easing himself into the hallway, he entertained the thought of avoiding the couple for the rest of his natural life. It might be tricky, but after a night like the last, Kibum felt up to the challenge. His dreams fizzled when he bumped into one of the owners of the flat in the kitchen.

“Good morning,” Jonghyun said, steadying the coffee that Kibum nearly knocked over.

“Hi.” Kibum managed to squeak.

“Look, I don’t want to force you into sharing anything about last night. I’m not Nicole. But if you want to talk, I’m here.”

“Okay.”

“’Okay’ as in you want to talk?”  
  
“’Okay’ as in I want to drown myself in the ocean. I slept with him, Jjong!” After trying so hard to keep it together, he finally broke down. Jonghyun set down his cup and brought Kibum into his arms.

“You had sex with him too. Loudly.” Taeyeon added sourly, emerging from her and Jonghyun’s room to pour her own mug of coffee. Kibum cried harder.

In a lot of ways, Taeyeon was like Nicole. She was pushy and brash and usually got what she wanted. But then, she was also her own unique person. Kibum had been confused by her since day one when she mentioned eating ants as a child. He still wondered if it had some lasting effect. That woman wasn’t normal.

“Taeyeon, sweetheart, I don’t think now is the right time to be so blunt.”

She gave a dismissive wave. “You coddle him too much. Kibum, you can’t change what you did. I understand you’ve had an overwhelming weekend, so take this time to cry it out. But fuck off with that drowning shit.”

“Love, I’m really not sure-”

“Shut up, _darling_ ,” she sassed and stepped closer to Kibum. “Like it or not, you’re single and you’ve found your soulmate. You also got way too drunk and fucked your soulmate in my house. It’s a lot to process and you did some things out of order, but you can’t shut down. When you’re ready, text Minho. Sleeping with him isn’t the end of the world. And stop crying all over my boyfriend! You know I’m insecure about how touchy-feely you two are.”

Being with Jonghyun had softened some of Taeyeon’s blunt tendencies, but not by much. She was a brat. Always taunting and teasing. Kibum would know, he was one of her favorite targets. But he had to admit that she was right. Sleeping with Minho hadn’t ruined everything if his offer of leaving his number with Jonghyun was to be considered.

After he caught his breath and discretely wiped any snot onto Jonghyun’s sweater, Kibum stepped away from his friend’s arms. He could do this. He could pull himself together. He’d been through a lot worse and this would get easier too.

With a final apology to Jonghyun and Tayeon about christening their spare room and a quick breakfast of Gatorade, he was feeling well enough to make the walk back to campus. A few steps from the door and Kibum realized his walk back was more of the walk-of-shame variety. He called an Uber for the rest of the way.

Being back in the dorm room felt surreal. So much had happened in the span of a couple days. A couple hours really. Kibum felt different. Older. Even worse, his room was filled with reminders of what had happened. In the corner was his official RA jacket that he ripped off after getting done with Friday night rounds. On top of his desk was the makeup Nicole brought over before his party. And front and center was his still unmade bed. The last time he slept in it was when Seop broke up with him. It was all very unsettling.

So hangover be damned, Kibum set out to erase the weekend. He washed his sheets, made his bed, and shoved the offending jacket in his wardrobe. After stowing away Nicole’s make up, he began arranging his school supplies. Books were aligned neatly on his shelf and pencils were meticulously sharpened. Half-way through clipping his nails, Kibum realized he still had course work to complete. And lots of it too. So Kibum refocused and set to work on his upcoming projects.

As it turned out, school was an even better distraction. Lost in color theory and softlines analysis, he was able to avoid thoughts of Minho and Seop all together. It was just him and his designs. And if designer Kibum didn’t want to deal with a broken heart and a messy hookup, designer Kibum didn’t have to.

The rest of September and the first weeks of October passed in the same manner. Kibum threw himself into his classes. And when he wasn’t in the design studio or the dorm, he picked up extra shifts at the coffee shop he and Jonghyun worked at. He gave himself no time to think about his love life. When his friends brought it up, Kibum feigned deafness. And if he sometimes ducked behind the manicured campus hedges to hide from Minho, then that was just his sexy little secret.

Unfortunately, avoiding Minho entirely wasn’t possible. Not only did Taemin and Jongin become pledges of Minho’s fraternity, but also Nicole’s Significant LooksTM whenever a Minho-related topic came up kept the man in the forefront of Kibum’s mind. His Minho-free luck ran out officially when his required one-on-one with his supervisor came up.

“So how have things been going, Kibum?” Jinki asked.

Jinki was the residence director of Kibum’s dorm. He was a quiet, gentle man in his late twenties with thighs that Kibum sometimes had weird dreams about. His leadership style was pretty laid back, but it was rumored that he could come down hard during conduct meetings. Not much else was known about Jinki, but he was probably an INFJ and he had the worst Instagram account Kibum had ever seen. It was just a few photos of some fields and clouds. One of a table. Kibum liked him anyway.

“Really great!” Kibum’s enthusiasm couldn’t have been more fake. “I finished my roommate agreement meetings, my first two floor events had pretty good attendance, and I’ve posted a sign-up sheet for fall semester check-ins.”

“It’s good to hear that you’re being proactive about in-hall programming! You’re definitely on your way to building a supportive community. I had conduct meetings with a couple of your residents – the two dancers, Jongin and Taemin, I think – and they both mentioned how much care and concern you’ve shown.”

Kibum barely managed to keep his eyes from rolling to the back of his head. Not only did Jinki sound like a residential life robot, but _of course_ the little shits would get written up and try dropping his name during a conduct meeting. Their appearance at his Bob Ross and bubble tea event made sense now. Jinki probably forced them. Those fuckers. They made a mess and drank a shitload of tea. Way more than anyone else. Kibum might still be bitter about it.

“Well, I think we’ve established that you’re doing well in your role as an RA. How are things outside of this position?”

And there it was. The question he was hoping to avoid. Mind racing, Kibum quickly thought of a way to guide Jinki’s question in a safer, less personal direction.

“Like school? Yeah, I’m doing good in my classes too. At least I think so. There was a group project that could go either way. But I’ve gotten great scores on my exams so far!”

Kibum mentally congratulated himself on swerving that one. Maybe he’d treat himself to bubble tea later.

“Oh good, it is midterm season, isn’t it? I’m glad you feel mostly confident in your studies. But I’m more interested in how you’re doing outside of academics and the curriculum of this position. I’ve heard some concerning things. Are you finding the support you need in your personal life?”

Fuck. Jinki was nothing if not persistent. Caring bastard.

“Um,” Kibum stalled, preparing for the biggest lie of his life, “it’s um- I mean, it’s- my personal life’s been fine too.” Not his best execution. He was definitely getting bubble tea.

“Full disclosure, I’ve already had one-on-ones with Nicole and Yeri. Between the two, I’ve been able to piece together what’s been going on. As far as I can tell, it hasn’t been affecting your community or your relationships with the rest of staff besides their worry. I guess I just want to be clear that me asking how you’re doing is purely coming from a place of concern.”

“I appreciate that.”  
  
“But you’d prefer not discussing it with me?” Jinki asked evenly, crossing his legs. Jesus, this man had a bleeding heart. And great thighs.

“It’s not that. Not really. I just haven’t taken the time to consider how it’s been affecting me.”

“From what I’ve heard, it sounds like you’ve been through a lot. It makes sense to want to avoid confronting some of that pain.”

Kibum smiled wryly, “I’m sensing a ‘but’ coming.”

“But,” Jinki conceded with his own smile, “You can’t avoid these things forever. Have you considered therapy?”

Kibum’s stomach flipped uncomfortably. Fuck bubble tea. It was a vodka kind of afternoon.

“No. Not really.”

“Please don’t misunderstand. I’m not saying that you specifically need therapy. I think everyone should see a therapist actually. It’s just that you may find conversations like these more productive with a professional. A therapist may help you navigate some of the big changes in your life.”

“I guess.”

Jinki sighed, “Maybe I shouldn’t have brought it up. Your work with your residents has been excellent, and I trust that you know what’s best for yourself and your success here. I was just worried.”

“Thanks for that,” Kibum finally said. “But I think I need to figure this out on my own. I’m fine. And I promise I won’t let it affect my role as an RA.”

“Alright, well, if there’s nothing else you’d like to discuss, I’ll see you tomorrow at staff meeting.”

Kibum agreed and quickly left Jinki’s office. Not in the mood to socialize, he waved to the RAs working at the front desk before returning to his room.

It needed to be cleaned again. His bed sheets were in disarray, his desk was covered in fabric scraps, and there was a growing mound of laundry in the basket beneath his bed. His nails probably could be cut too. And his pencils were looking a little dull. But that could all wait.

With a resigned sigh, Kibum accepted his fate. He knew what he had to do. A few weeks of constant distractions had been enough. He couldn’t avoid Minho any longer.

Scrolling through his contacts wasn’t easy with sweaty, shaking hands, but eventually Kibum pulled up Minho’s number. Jonghyun had passed it along weeks ago. But Kibum wasn't ready then. He still wasn't sure if he was ready now.

Taking a deep breath, Kibum copied the note that he had typed out one night when he had felt particularly lonely and pasted it into the text box.    

Heart pounding, he hit send.


	4. It's a Date

**Kibum** to **Minho** : Hi. This is Kibum. Your soulmate

 **Kibum** to **Minho** : Do you want to get coffee this weekend?

“Large hazelnut latte!”

Kibum approached the counter his friend stood at and picked up his drink with uncontrollably shaking hands. Goddammit. Why was his body betraying him in his time of need? He worked out. He drank water. He occasionally ate vegetables. He didn’t deserve this.

“Hey, try to calm down, okay? Everything’s going to be fine. He’s already your soulmate. He’s going to like you.” Jonghyun soothed.

Not trusting himself to speak, Kibum just nodded.

After weeks of avoiding Minho, Kibum had finally texted him. Before he knew it, the date had arrived and he found himself dressed impeccably and standing just a few meters away from him. Dress well test well, right? Except this wasn’t a test. And there was a snag in his sweater.

Fuck. He couldn’t do this.

When did he become such a coward? Reduced to trembling hands and knocking knees. It was pathetic. _He_ was pathetic. What would Minho think when he saw him like this? Would he be disgusted? Would he laugh in his face? Get up and leave? Humor him for a couple years before breaking up with him over the phone on his birthday?

He _really_ couldn’t do this.

“Listen, Minho seems sweet. We’ve been texting for a couple weeks and he’s definitely interested in you. I’m sure he’s nervous too. Just turn around and start by saying ‘hi.’”

Suppressing the urge to flee, Kibum nodded again and did as Jonghyun suggested. Immediately his eyes made contact with Minho’s across the café. It was cheesy and Kibum would never admit to it later, but the moment was magical. When their eyes met he felt reassured. Just like their first encounter in the dorm, the feeling of completeness washed over Kibum. And when Minho smiled at him, he felt like he was floating. With thoughts of the loose thread in his sweater swept aside, he began weaving around the coffee shop’s tables towards his soulmate.

“Hi.” Kibum greeted, slightly breathless.

“Hey! Hi! I don’t think I ever introduced myself,” Minho said as if it wasn’t Kibum’s fault that they hadn’t spoken in weeks. “I’m Minho.”

“Um, I’m Kibum. Can I sit down?” He asked, gesturing to the table that was almost completely covered in books and papers.

“Of course! Yeah! Let me just clean this. I didn’t want to be late so I came early, but then I came _too_ early so I started studying. I have a really big exam tomorrow that I’ve been stressing about and we’re coming up on greek week soon and I just-” Minho paused his frantic shuffling of his notes and smiled disarmingly, “I’m sorry for being so nervous. It’s really nice to finally talk to you.”

“It is,” Kibum replied quietly, fiddling with the paper sleeve of his drink to avoid the intensity of Minho’s earnestness. Mustering up some courage, he asked, “So you’ve been studying for a test. In what class?”

“Intro to developing cognition and language. I’m an early childhood education major.”

Wait. What? Early childhood education? Not finance or marketing or prelaw or beer bongs or smoking doobies? What kind of frat president was Minho?

“Oh?"

Minho smiled, “It probably seems boring to you. Jonghyun told me you’re doing fashion design. But I love kids. After I got injured, teaching was an easy second choice.”

Kibum had so many questions. First of all, just how much had Jonghyun shared with Minho? Was it the surface level stuff that anyone with an internet connection could find or was it the deep, dark, bottom-of-the-iceberg, we-know-all-of-each-other’s-secrets-so-we-can-never-breakup stuff? Second, Minho loved kids? And was an early childhood education major? Kibum was still in disbelief. Weren’t all frat boys supposed to be obsessed with networking and making money? And what was this about getting injured? Kibum had seen Minho. _All_ of Minho. He looked perfectly fine. In every definition of the word.

“You got injured?”

“Oh right, my dad’s a soccer coach, so my brother and I grew up playing. It’s not like we were forced to train or anything, but we both had dreams of going pro. My brother does play professionally, he’s on a team from LA, but I got hurt and had to stop”

Genuinely curious, Kibum asked, “What happened?”

“I smashed the cartilage in my knee and tore a ligament during a match. It took me out completely for a whole year. I was devastated. I couldn’t play and I missed the chance to start college with my friends. I’ve had to take summer classes to catch up.”

“I had no idea,” Kibum admitted. And he really hadn’t. From everything that he had seen and heard, it seemed like Minho’s life was perfect. “I’m so sorry. That must have been hard.”

“It was,” Minho agreed. “My brother was always better than me. He’s a little older, so it made sense at first, but then he turned into this prodigy. My dad was really proud of him. When I got hurt, it felt like I was nothing. Looking back, I was never going to reach Minseok’s level. I guess in a way it helps to feel like I have something to prove. And something that’s my own.”

Kibum was pleasantly surprised. Not that Minho got injured and didn’t feel like he measured up to his brother, but that talking with him was so easy. Even more surprising was how vulnerable he was being. Realistically, Minho and Kibum were strangers. Sure they were soulmates and sure they fucked, but they didn’t actually know one another. It was nice that Minho was so open and comfortable sharing things with him. It made Kibum feel special somehow.

“Too heavy for a first date?”

Before he could stop himself, Kibum blurted, “This isn’t a date.”

Minho visibly deflated.

“Shit, no, I didn’t mean it like that. This would be a very nice first date. Like, a good one. A really, _really_ good one. And wow, I’d love to date you if you’re still interested. It’s just that the way we met and then the way we had sex-”

“I don’t regret fucking you.”

“Well,” Kibum said breezily, “that sure is nice to hear.”

“Damn, now I sound like the idiot-”

“Hey!”

Minho had the decency to apologize before trying again, “What I wanted to say is that it doesn’t matter how we met or how we hooked up. I want this to be a date. I _want_ to date you.”

Kibum was ... relieved. It felt like a weight had been lifted off his chest. Miraculously, after weeks of being ghosted, Minho still wanted to date him. Him! Minho wanted to date Kim Kibum who cried in front of a stranger in his underwear, drunkenly fucked said stranger in his friend’s apartment, and then hid behind bushes to avoid confrontation. Kibum was just so glad he hadn’t ruined things before they could even start.

“Besides, getting coffee is a textbook first date.”

Kibum couldn’t argue with that logic, nor did he really want to. He was still so thankful that Minho was interested in him. “I guess you’re right.”

“Okay, so now that we’ve agreed that this is a date, let’s do first date questions!” Minho suggested enthusiastically.

The fuck? Who was this man?

“First date questions?”

“Yeah! Like what do you like to do for fun? What are your hobbies?”

Question one and Kibum was already stumped. What were his hobbies? In retrospect, all of his free time was spent on Seop. Texting him, snapchatting him, waiting for him to respond, searching for places they could spend time so that their relationship wouldn’t be revealed and Seop wouldn’t be outed.

Kibum really was pathetic. He let his significant other take over his life and he hadn't ever realized it.

“Um, I like going out,” Kibum finally managed. “I like dancing. And designing clothes.”

“The first two aren’t hobbies and the second is your major. Gimme some real hobbies.”

Uncomfortable with how close to home Minho was hitting, Kibum corrected, “Those are real hobbies! Dancing is totally a hobby. And just because my major is design doesn’t mean that I can’t draw things out in my spare time.”

“Fine, fine. I’ll let it slide. What’s your favorite-”

“Hold on,” Kibum interrupted, deciding to play along and also get the attention off himself, “You haven’t told me your hobbies.”

“Right, well, I’m in a fraternity, so that takes up a lot of time, but I like watching movies and sports. I go to the gym too. And parties. And I still play soccer, just on intramural teams.”

Minho was sounding more and more like a typical frat boy and Kibum was reminded of the pictures he saw. The ones where Minho was wearing Vineyard Vines with his arms around beautiful women. He probably didn’t have the right, but Kibum was disappointed. Maybe dating wasn’t a good idea. After all, Kibum just got out of a relationship that he was slowly realizing wasn’t very healthy. And what if Minho was like those other Sig Mu Ep boys? The ones that-

“What’s your favorite color?” Minho asked, interrupting Kibum’s thoughts. “Mine’s green.”

Still struggling with his discomfort and unable to stop himself, Kibum scoffed, “Of course it is.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It doesn’t mean anything,” He tried backtracking. “I like magenta.”

Minho didn’t let him off that easily, “It clearly meant something. You made a judge-y noise.”

“’A judge-y noise?’”

“Yes! What’s wrong with liking green? I didn’t say anything about you liking bougie purple.”

“And why would you? Because I’m gay? You think I like _magenta_ because I like boys?” Kibum accused, practically spitting venom.

“Jesus Christ, Kibum!” Minho exclaimed, “I’m bi! Why would I have a problem with you being gay? So what’s the problem with me liking green?”

“It’s just that you’re so- you’re just- you’re such a stereotype! You’re the president of a frat, you watch sports, you play soccer, you have washboard abs, you take pictures with hot blondes, and you- you like green!”

Kibum knew he was being ridiculous. There was nothing wrong with green. Kibum was actually becoming quite fond of the shade of emerald that spelled out Minho’s first words to him. There was nothing technically wrong with being in a frat or liking sports either. It’s just that Minho is his _soulmate_. Why did he have to be a part of an organization that quite literally ruined Kibum's life a couple years ago?

“I’m also a bisexual, Korean man who wants to become an elementary school teacher,” Minho reminded him, not unkindly. “And even if I wasn’t those things and I just liked working out and partying with my brothers, I don’t have to defend my interests to you. As long as I'm not hurting anybody, it doesn’t make me any less valid to like stereotypical frat stuff. Plus, if we’re playing the stereotype game, a gay fashion designer isn’t exactly novel either, Versace.”

Put in his place, and by a frat boy none the less, the only thing Kibum could think of saying was, “It’s pronounced ‘Versach-EH.’”

“Of course it is.” It was not lost on Kibum that Minho used the exact words that started this debacle. Snide, witty, thoughtful bastard.

How was it possible that Minho was this perfect? He was sweet, and charming, and earnest. And god if he wasn’t attractive. Being with him was like a rollercoaster. One minute things were vulnerable and intimate, the next, thought-provoking and intense. Kibum wondered again: who the fuck was this man?

“Anyway, how do you know I’m the president of my fraternity and that I like blondes?”

Kibum’s question was answered: Minho was the devil, that’s who he was. A derisive, sadistic devil that lived to embarrass Kibum by forcing him to reveal his internet creeping.

“I kind of ... _might_ have ... foundphotosofyouonInstagram.”

“Sorry, I didn’t catch that last part.”

Minho was not sorry. Not at all if the smug little smile on his face was any indication. Fuck. Why was he doing this to Kibum? Was this what their relationship was going to be like? A mix of openness, support and teasing? Because honestly, Kibum could be happy with a relationship like that.

“I said I found pictures of you on Instagram. With blondes.”

“I don’t have an Instagram.”

“Right.” Kibum agreed, cheeks getting warmer by the second.

“Hold on, you looked through other people’s accounts to find pictures of me?”

The heat had spread to Kibum’s ears and neck now. Caught red handed. And red faced. On a positive note, his soulmate wasn’t stupid. On a negative, Kibum’s late-night stalking was exposed and Minho looked positively delighted about it.

“Cute.” He cooed.

“I was curious!” Kibum defended while fanning his burning cheeks. “I barely knew anything about you and suddenly you were my soulmate. Not to mention the timing was absolutely godawful and I wasn’t going to sleep that night anyway.”

Minho’s expression sobered. With an apologetic smile, he confessed, “If it makes you feel better, I interrogated Taemin and Jongin about you for like five hours over the course of their pledge education.”

His attempt at mollifying Kibum had the opposite effect.

“Why would that make me feel better? What did those fuckers say about me?"

“Be nice!” Minho chided. “One of those fuckers is my little. And they had some interesting insights.”

Kibum’s stomach dropped, “Yeah? Like what?”

“Don’t get me wrong, they totally roasted you for listening to weird music and talking in third person. But they told me that knowing you made them feel grateful for having parents that were okay with their relationship. You’re the first gay guy they’ve met besides each other and like one high school teacher, so they kind of look up to you. They said they think you’re brave for dealing with all the shit you’ve had to face.”

Kibum was genuinely shocked. He remembered having a couple heart-to-hearts with Taemin and Jongin, but those were during mandatory dorm things where residents usually zoned out. He hadn’t realized anything he said actually stuck.

“I can’t believe they would tell you all of that.”

“Eh, don’t be too surprised. Gossiping about your RA is always fun. And remember, one of them is my little.”

“Which one?”

“Taemin.”

“How’s that going?”

Now, Kibum loved all his residents equally (that was a lie, he hated at least three of them) but some left a bigger impression than others. Some were special. Taemin was one of those special ones. Even after two months of being neighbors, Kibum still couldn’t tell if Taemin was really as absentminded as he seemed or if he just didn’t give a fuck.

“He’s the weirdest little dude I’ve ever met.” Minho said through a fond smile.

“I know, right?” Kibum leaned closer to Minho and asked conspiratorially, “Did he tell you he was the one that set off the sprinklers because he forgot to add water to his microwave mac and cheese?”

“Oh my god, no! He’s so dumb! I love him.”

When they had both stopped laughing, Minho careful asked, “He did mention that you’ve had some tough relationships in the past. Like with your parents and Seop. Can I ask you about them?”

“I don’t know. That’s kind of heavy for a first date.” Kibum said, trying and failing to maintain the light and playful vibe.

Generally speaking, he didn’t like to reveal his emotional baggage until the fourth date. But then again, unless it was just a hookup, Kibum preferred to wait until the third date to have sex. He and Minho had already done that, so was this technically their fourth date? How many dates does drunken birthday sex with your soulmate equal? Just one? Two? Two and a half?

Interrupting Kibum’s calculations, Minho admitted, “I know it’s a lot to ask. I don’t think I’ll ever forget how heartbroken you looked the night we met. But I’d like to hear about things from you, not just from Taemin.”

Kibum sighed, “There’s not too much to say really. It just comes down to my parents being homophobic and Hyungseop ending things because he thought he could find someone better. He’s a model doing the whole fashion week thing and he felt like he had a chance of finding his soulmate this season. It was just shitty timing with my birthday.”

“How long were you guys together?”

“Two years.”

“Damn,” Minho whistled. “I’m sorry. That’s a long time to just end things like that. Models really are superficial, huh?”

“I thought we agreed we weren’t going to fall for stereotypes.” Kibum said, trying again to lighten the mood.

Minho smiled gently, “I think we can make an exception for your shitty ex.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right.”

“What about your parents?”

Again, Kibum _really_ preferred to discuss his childhood trauma much later in a relationship. Or not at all. Minho’s whole caring-about-Kibum’s-life thing was really messing that up.

“Things aren’t the greatest between us. I haven’t spoken to them in a while. The last time was at my grandmother’s funeral. I stayed with her through most of high school after I came out.” Kibum neglected to mention that the reason he lived with her was because he was no longer welcome in his parents’ house.

Minho was silent, absorbing everything while his hands pushed around his now-empty coffee cup. Had Kibum scared him away? This was just a sampling of Kibum’s shitty past. How would he react when he learned about the other stuff? The stuff that involved his fraternity.

“I’m really sorry about everything,” Minho finally said. “I can see why Taemin and Jongin would feel lucky. I’ve been really lucky too. My family were supportive when I came out. Even my dad. I may have mentioned you to them. They’re all very excited to meet you. Eventually though! No rush or anything.”

They hadn't even gone on a date yet and Minho had already told his family about him? Cute. Unrealistically optimistic, but cute none the less.

“I think I’d like to meet them too. Especially your brother. He can introduce me to some hot soccer players.”

“Hey! I can still play! And I’ll have you know I’ve been voted hottest Sig Mu Ep two years in a row by Panhel.”

Kibum tried, but he couldn’t keep the grimace off his face.

“You really don’t like greek life, do you?”

“I’m sorry,” Kibum said. And he was. Minho’s fraternity seemed very important to him. He was president after all. But Kibum couldn’t get past what happened. The culture that he saw, that took advantage of him, forever soured his perception.

“You know, for the most part, SME are a really good group of guys. We’ve had our sordid past, but I think we’re making steps to be better.”

An uncomfortable prickle shot down Kibum’s spine and he felt the urge to run away again.

“What do you mean?” He asked instead.

“Even before I became president, I’ve been working to change some of our outdated bylaws. We haven’t made updates to ours in years. And even with those updates, we’re still operating off stuff written in the ‘80s. I’m trying to change the wording to be more inclusive and establish clear repercussions for bias. We’ve had some incidents in the past.”

Kibum’s heart jumped into overdrive. Did Minho know? Was the bias about what happened to him? Oh god, he didn’t think he could continue sitting here casually if Minho knew about-

“Luckily, nothing’s happened while I’ve been around. And the response to the changes has been really positive so far. So I think it’s a good indicator that things are changing. I guess I kinda understand your dislike though.”

He knew. Holy fuck. Minho knew and he just sat there acting like Kibum’s life hadn’t been ruined by what happened. How could he defend his frat knowing what they had done? Was he brainwashed or just cruel?

“You understand?” Kibum seethed, ready to end both the date and his budding relationship with Minho.

Not picking up on Kibum’s rage, Minho continued, “Well yeah, I mean, being an RA and all, you probably have to deal with wasted baby frat boys all the time. That’s gotta get really annoying.”

Oh.

So Minho didn't know then. Which meant Kibum would probably have to be the one to tell him at some point. He couldn't keep suffering through these spikes of anxiety and dread every time Minho discussed his frat. But what date do you reveal that you were ruthlessly taken advantage of by the organization that your soulmate presides over? Kibum was too drained to figure out the math for that question.

“We should probably wrap things up, huh?” Minho asked, finally tuning into Kibum’s mood.

“Yeah, I better let you get back to studying.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me. This was really nice though. Thank you for coming. Can we see each other again?” The hopeful eagerness on Minho’s face soothed any lingering tension Kibum felt.

Minho definitely wasn’t cruel. Just uninformed.

“I’d like that.”

“Okay! Great! Um, so remember how I said I liked movies? Well, I’m actually in a film club on campus and we’re watching this French movie on Thursday night that’s supposed to be really good and we always buy snacks and stuff. Would you wanna go with me? You don’t have to pay or be a member to go, but it’s totally okay if that’s not your thing!”

“I’ll be there,” Kibum assured. “Just text me the details so I know where to show up.”

“I can definitely do that!”

With their next date figured out, they began saying their goodbyes. Kibum wished Minho good luck on his test and Minho thanked him again for meeting with him. There was an extended pause where a kiss or a hug should have happened but didn’t. Instead, Kibum threw up a peace sign and Minho responded with one of those head bob things that straight men greet each other with.

Kibum spent the walk back to the dorm replaying everything that happened. Despite the roller coaster of emotions the date took him on, he felt good. Optimistic. Minho was refreshingly honest. He challenged Kibum, but still managed to be caring and sweet. Despite their differences and Kibum's past, maybe things really could work out for them. Maybe soulmates weren’t bullshit after all.

Just as Kibum came to that realization, his phone indicated that he had gotten new messages.

 **Minho** to **Kibum:** Hi! This is Minho. Your soulmate ;)

 **Minho** to **Kibum:** Thanks for coffee this weekend. I’m sending you a selfie so you can stop drooling over pictures of me on my friend’s accounts

Seconds later, a snapchat popped up from Minho. In it, he was smiling at the camera and making a heart with his fingers. In bright pink text he had typed out, “Can’t wait to see you at the movie!”

Kibum didn’t save it, but he wanted to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for the lovely comments. they really make my day.


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